Grief needs a witness: A psychological study of the witness, from the perspective of Jungian psychology and self psychology

摘要

This dissertation explores the necessity and function of a present, understanding other for psychological healing after the experience of loss. We need a witness to our grief. In order to integrate the experience of loss, no matter what the nature of our loss, we want a caring other to see, understand, and help us to make sense our of our experience. The witnessing other comes in many and varied forms, addressing us on the personal level, as in helpful individuals around us, and on the numinous level, as in dreams and intuitions.;The study applies a hermeneutic method of research, gathering and interpreting clinical and theoretical material from analytic psychology, self psychology, religious mythology, and contemporary culture. My efforts focus on the practical application of witnessing in psychotherapy. The psychotherapeutic relationship facilitates healing through the use of empathy toward the patient and understanding the nature of each particular loss, whether it involves early childhood trauma, physical or psychological injury or illness, or death of a loved one. This psychotherapeutic relationship also facilitates healing through acknowledging and tapping into the Self connection. The therapist and the patient study together the dreams and other creative and imaginative expressions brought into the clinical work.;There are several factors that contribute to the curative power of being witnessed. I discovered that feeling seen and understood is critical at the initial stage in facing grief. There is a containing or soothing function performed by the witnessing other at this point. The witnessed one is able to tolerate the experience of loss as a result of feeling joined rather than being isolated and alone. Once painful affect is met and support has been accepted, the witness can help the witnessed in the process of meaning making. Giving meaning to the experience of grief is essential in its resolution. Resolution of grief is not the same as making it go away. The experience of grief is devalued if we treat our losses as if they had never happened. Integrating loss in a meaningful way can be the job of a lifetime. Grief can be a powerful teacher and valuable mentor if accompanied by the empathic witness.;The witness appears predictably in the loved one and in the person who is in the role of helper. But the witness also appears in dreams, creative expression, numinous experience, and in other surprising places that may be unbidden. For some people whose lives seem void of a caring personal witness, the archetypal Witness intervenes out of necessity to protect the fragile self from destruction. And sometimes this type of intervention leads to a resiliency of spirit or character in the witnessed, who goes on to achieve great things.