Monday. Plagiarism is an ugly word. It suggests thievery, obviously. But it just sounds ugly. Plagiarism. Like something nasty you catch from a stranger on the internet. Which is how it usually spreads, of course. Like a virulent, lucrative rumour. They say troubles come in threes. No surprise then that my legal interns are currently dealing with a troika of bullshit from some of my bitterest rivals. The claims themselves are laughable. It is almost as if certain people have looked at my work, thought 'why didn't I think of that?' then forwarded that thought to some intellectual property busybollocks who has finessed it into 'Why! didn't I think of that?' And the next thing I know, I'm being sued up to the gallbladder by speccy chancers in buttoned, tieless shirts from here to Addis Ababa.
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