TED AGONISTES

摘要

Why won't the message get through that I am important, so important, and that whenever people come around the office and see me wedged into the little desk right by the door, they should know that I am the one who is really in charge? Didn't the boss once say to me: "We couldn't run this place without all of you"? But he really did not mean you in the plural but you in the singular, meaning just me, because all the other 'me's they've created were just created from me. You people walk in and think, "Oh, it's just another Ted. And I'll treat him like I treat the other Teds. I'll smile at him. He dies for a smile. He's maladaptive in a way that perfectly adapts him for high-stress environments." I read the reports. They wrote the reports after talking to me. I'm not another Ted, I am the Ted.